too much time to think

I've been feeling really inadequate lately. It seems that my self-confidence is lowering at a rate inversely proportional to my increase in independence. Such murky, muddy waters I find myself in these days. What am I looking for? How do I navigate this world feeling as alone as I do? Even with the people in my life--I am uncomfortably alone. I need a real human connection. Everything feels so superficial and temporary. I wish that someone could really, deeply know me and let me really, deeply know them. Trying to accept that this is not happening now and that I must move on...but it is paralyzing at times.